Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Writers, Ghostwriters, and Real Writers.


Not the hottest of news, I know, but when I found out that Chantelle* had signed a £300,000 deal to write her autobiography my sympathy immediately went out to the ghostwriter.l
“Oh my God. It’s metal, innit? It’s, it’s… mental, innit? Well mental, know what I mean? Oh my God, like, know what I mean…” The sheer number of words you’d have to endure to obtain any information, a thousand “innits” for every fact. Apart from, “what’s your favourite make up?” it’d be very hard work.
She’s 21, what would we get? A whole chapter on ‘Barbie ‘n’ me‘?
Not, of course, that the start of a life isn’t enough material for a book. There’s a whole genre, the coming of age novel, and many fine memoirs - Nigel Slater’s engrossing ’Toast’ for just one recent example - leave the narrator poised on the cusp of adulthood.
But those are proper books, consciously written, rather than a list of what a Celebrity has done “as told to” a ghostwriter.

*By the way Chantelle does have a second name: it’s “Off Big Brother” in case you didn’t know.

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